Hi, you've never seen me before because i never write on your updates but i do read them every week. I just wanted to write to give you some support. I went through a similar thing in a relationship (not marriage just bf/gf) and his mother was so overbearing that she would come over to our place every day just to see him and cook for him. At first, when it started happening i thought i just had to deal with it because i thought it was rude to set boundaries with his mother. When i did talk to him about it he made it seem like i was being rude and paranoid. Eventually, it became an everyday argument and we went our separate ways. At first, i felt the way you felt and thought that I was supposed to do more. That i was the one that was supposed to make it work. Like i could've done more and me not doing that was just me giving up.
You can't force a relationship with someone who is so ready to give up so easily. Marriage and relationships include compromise and it sounds like he wasn't ready to do that. you've had your talks with him and have tried to communicate. You've done your part. It's up to him now whether he's officially going to go through with it. Don't blame yourself for something you cannot change. DO NOT drive yourself insane on what you could've done and what you "should've" done. DO NOT do the same thing over and over again expecting a different result. DO NOT let a man show you more than once that he doesn't want you and doesn't want to make things work. DO NOT let your worth and your happiness be evaluated by your relationships. I'm not explicitly going to say leave because i don't think that is a good thing to say, but if a marriage makes you feel like this i don't think it's a marriage to be in. Also, i'm sure your mother wants what's best for you, especially your happiness
No matter what you decide the community that you've gathered online will always be there for you. I will always be here to support you. Whether it be silently on the sidelines or through these forums. Do what you need to do and please after everything is over and you still feel this way, please seek mental help for your sake. I hope i didn't overstep and i apologize if i did. I wish you all of the best!